{"id":359,"date":"2015-09-26T07:05:13","date_gmt":"2015-09-26T07:05:13","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/smartrecoverybc.com\/?page_id=359"},"modified":"2015-09-26T07:05:13","modified_gmt":"2015-09-26T07:05:13","slug":"exchange-vocabulary","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/smartrecoverybc.com\/index.php\/resources\/tool-chest-and-homework\/exchange-vocabulary.html","title":{"rendered":"Exchange Vocabulary"},"content":{"rendered":"

Exchange Vocabulary<\/h1>\n

Upset feelings are usually caused by the way we are thinking about what is happening, not the events themselves. To change your feelings (and your behavior), try the following “Exchange Vocabulary.”<\/p>\n

This idea was given to me by a client, who related it to an exchange list for unhealthy foods. When you first try this new way of thinking, it might not feel right. The more you do it, however, the more natural these realistic beliefs will become.<\/p>\n

I think you will like the results, but prove it for yourself by giving it a fair try. Good luck.<\/p>\n

\u00a9 Robert F. Sarmiento, Ph.D. Used here with permission.<\/p>\n

Word Exchange Table<\/h2>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
Instead of thinking:<\/em><\/strong><\/td>\nTry thinking:<\/em><\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Must<\/strong><\/td>\nPrefer<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Should<\/strong><\/td>\nChoose To<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Have To<\/strong><\/td>\nWant<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Can’t<\/strong><\/td>\nChoose Not To<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Ought<\/strong><\/td>\nHad Better<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
All<\/strong><\/td>\nMany<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Always<\/strong><\/td>\nOften<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Can’t Stand<\/strong><\/td>\nDon’t Like<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Awful<\/strong><\/td>\nHighly Undesirable<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Bad Person<\/strong><\/td>\nBad\u00a0<\/strong>Behaviour<\/b><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
I am a Failure<\/strong><\/td>\nI Failed At<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n

 <\/p>\n

Statements<\/h2>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
Instead of Saying:<\/em><\/strong><\/td>\nExchange With:<\/em><\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
I have to do well.<\/strong><\/td>\nI want to do well.<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
You shouldn’t do that.<\/strong><\/td>\nI prefer you not do that.<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
You never help me.<\/strong><\/td>\nYou rarely help me.<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
I can’t stand my job.<\/strong><\/td>\nI don’t like my job.<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
You are a bad boy.<\/strong><\/td>\nThat\u00a0behaviour\u00a0is undesirable.<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
I’m a loser.<\/strong><\/td>\nI failed at this one task.<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
I need love.<\/strong><\/td>\nI want love, but don’t need it.<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n

 <\/p>\n

Emotional Vocabulary Exchange<\/h2>\n

REBT does not<\/em> endeavour to eliminate emotions. Quite to the contrary! Emotions are very useful and part of the human advantage — When Appropriate!<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
Instead of Saying:<\/em><\/strong><\/td>\nExchange With:<\/em><\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Anxious<\/strong><\/td>\nConcerned<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Depressed<\/strong><\/td>\nSad<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Angry<\/strong><\/td>\nAnnoyed<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Guilt<\/strong><\/td>\nRemorse<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Shame<\/strong><\/td>\nRegret<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Hurt<\/strong><\/td>\nDisappointed<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Jealous<\/strong><\/td>\nConcern for my relationship<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"Exchange Printer friendly version<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Exchange Vocabulary Upset feelings are usually caused by the way we are thinking about what is happening, not the events themselves. To change your feelings (and your behavior), try the following “Exchange Vocabulary.” This idea was given to me by a client, who related it to an exchange list for unhealthy foods. When you first…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":319,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"give_campaign_id":0,"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-359","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry","description-off"],"yoast_head":"\nExchange Vocabulary - SMART Recovery Self-Help Addiction Recovery Program | Addiction Support Groups<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/smartrecoverybc.com\/index.php\/resources\/tool-chest-and-homework\/exchange-vocabulary.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Exchange Vocabulary\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Exchange Vocabulary Upset feelings are usually caused by the way we are thinking about what is happening, not the events themselves. 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